Highly Annoying Starling-Repelling Loud-speakers at Tsukuba Center Might be Effective (this season every evening from 4:30-7:30) – but they have me yearning for the amusing “bird-chasers” of years past!

By Avi Landau

One of the starling-repelling speakers that emit a continuous series of all but unbearable squeaks, screeches and squawks at Tsukuba Center Plaza from 4:30 PM till darkness sets in (during summer). For some reason starlings (MUKUDORI, in Japanese), in huge flocks, like to roost for the night in brightly lit places, with a special preferences for major train-stations and central-squares. That would be fine if they didn`t leave such a steaming. sticky mess behind on the ground that has to be cleaned up each morning (at great cost and effort). So that is why these speakers have been set up – to keep the birds away. The only thing is that these recorded and highly amplified starling distress calls are extremely distressing to (most) humans, as well, and they make it all but impossible to sit outside and enjoy an evening at Tsukuba Center. It makes me yearn for the days when the starling “shooing” was carried out by an unlikely troupe of city-office workers armed with loudspeakers, plastic umbrella covers, and even balloons.

A poster on the trunk of the same tree saying: “To prevent starlings from gathering in this tree we are going to be making noise in the evening” (That’s an understatement!) Then the starling itself is quoted as saying: “When we gather in, tweet, in these trees, tweet, we drop loads of poop on the ground… sorry!”

In former years the amplified avian distress calls  were blasted from hand-held loudspeakers wielded by the indefatiguable “bird-chasers” of Tsukuba center. While the racket they made WAS irritating, they were at least amusing! The present is nothing but annoying.

By the summer of 2017, after years of research, the Tsukuba City Office, in collabortion with a team of ornithologists, had finally found the perfect way of keeping the starlings away from Tsukuba Center- this single tiny loudspeaker up in a tree – the only problem was that the birds quickly learned to ignore its horrible squawking. The only things driven away were the customers from the surrounding cafes and restaurants. The new system DOES keep the birds away – but the noise is only JUST BEARABLE for non-headset wearing humans!

Swarms of MUKUDORI descending on Tsukuba Center

Summers  have always been NOISY in Tsukuba with the incessant buzz of cicadas and other insects. But in recent years the mid-August cacophany heard around the Tsukuba Center  has become nothing less than frightening! Yesterday evening I stepped out of the Okura (now the Nikko) Hotel’s lobby and out onto the road. Naturally, the cicadas (semi) were chirping and droning, and this made me feel as if I had ringing in the ears. Then suddenly, from up in the sky and towards the south, there appeared a black swarm, and then another, and still yet another dark mass. These were flocks of Grey Starlings (mukudori) coming to roost for the night around the Center. I stood mesmerized by their interweaving which created visual effects more fascinating than any kaleidoscope or lava lamp. As the starlings started to settle into the trees, the cicada-driven noise more than doubled its volume and you could virtually feel the soundwaves vibrating against your body. Then, suddenly, another sound rose up above the rest of the din.  Extremely loud and like something out of a nightmare. If I hadn`t known better I would have thought I was walking past a slaughterhouse –  or that Godzilla, Gamera, Mothra and all their Japanese movie-monster companions had descended upon Tsukuba for some final, decisive battle.

That was what I imagined the first time I encountered this horrifying racket 3 years ago, and it was the same thing was probably going through the minds of all the bewildered first-time hearers who were standing outside with me, looking around in fright.

The soiled groundscapes which can still be found every morning near Tsukuba Center – making a walk along this promenade a tricky and stick business!

One of the weapons in the bird-chasers’ arsenal – inflated plastic umbrella covers (the kind used to cover your wet umbrella when you enter a shop, office or other facility. These can be used to create a highly disturbing sound. This is done by vigorously rubbing the two ends of the “bag” together, in the manner of washing socks or underwear by hand. The effect of the noise produced by this action on the human ear is not unlike that elicited by a hand slowly scratching a chalkboard

This year, however, I knew better. It was the BIRD-CHASERS! They were back at it again, fighting their never-ending battle of keeping the starlings ( mukudori) AWAY from Tsukuba Center. They go about their task by making very loud and very ANNOYING noises – the highly amplified distress call of the Starling itself ( blasted out of mega-phone-like devices) and more humorously ( and economically), by rubbing on balloons or inflated plastic umbrella bags to make a distinctive screech-like sound, highly irritating to both the birds and humans ( but especially to the humans, it seems!) Why the folks at Tsukuba Center  want to get rid of the birds  is something easy to understand. Besides the horrible racket the birds make, their droppings are prodigious and the ground along the pedestrian square area between the hotel and Nova Hall and then the path stretching towards the library  becomes pasty and difficult to maneuver. Not pleasant at all, especially when you are wearing sandals. In the festering heat of August, this situation is probably not very good from a hygienic standpoint either. Eager to see my old friends the BIRD-CHASERS, I forgot all about the humidity for a moment and sauntered up the stairway to the Center`s upper plaza. Looking around for familiar faces, I was surprised to find that instead of the usual 2 or 3 guys  from the city office, armed with megaphone , plastic bag and  bare hands ( used for vigorous clapping), there was a large contingent of men, all armed with these traditional weapons of the trade, spread out all over the area. Re-enforcements had been brought in!

Taking a well-deserved rest

A sign at Tsukuba Center reads: Beware of falling starling droppings- and please note that high volume distress calls will be broadcast to keep starlings away

Ahh.. I miss these guys!

That IS a good thing, since in past years you couldn`t help but feel sorry for the poor guys who had to CHASE after the flocks of birds as they flew from tree to tree. This year, each chaser waited for a flock to come his way, and when one did they proceeded to do their thing. You could even say that they looked like they were having fun, each of them trying, it seemed, to suppress a boyish grin. Photographing  and speaking with these gentlemen, I found that instead of being from the City-Office, they were mostly from the company UR, which manages the Tsukuba Center Area, and this, of course , involves keeping it clean. Watching one of the bird-chasers begin to tire as he rubbed on a balloon, I joked that its  better to rub ( the balloons) than to have to SCRUB the poop off the walkways! For those of us bystanders who had gathered to watch , we could not help by OOH and AAH as the starling flocks interwove and mingled, and then tried to alight and test out the safety of potential places. The noise made by the BIRD-CHASERS soon had them take to the air again, in search of a quieter place to settle down for the night. Anyway, this week you should still be able to enjoy watching the interweaving flocks, and the spectacle ( both visual and acoustic) of the bird-chasers trying to get rid of them. It really is something to behold ( and behear!) Ironically, even with all the heroic efforts of the bird-casers , the birds do NOT  move very far away, and in fact, when I came back to the same spot later at night, I found that the trees at Tsukuba Center were all full of starlings! Why do the starlings like to roost in the center of the city? no-one is really sure, but  I guess it makes them feel safe from predators. They must also prefer  trees  lined up neatly in a row. The cicadas and starlings will be keeping things noisy for a few more weeks. If you too would like to hear the buzz and watch the starlings interweave come to the bridge between Right-On and Days Town, at dusk. The bird-chasers will be the upper-plaza out-side the Okura Hotel, between the station and Nova Hall, every evening for the next few weeks at around 6:30 PM. You cant miss the racket!

No job is safe from technological obsolescence! After the most effective distress call for driving away the starlings was determined and the effective spots for setting speakers was found- the bird-chasers days of chasing the birds away were over (see one of the speakers in the tree?). They begin blaring at 6:20 in the evening. The only problem is that it is not only the starlings that are affected. Many potential users of the otherwise attractive space (and customers for the eateries in the area that offer out-door seating) are driven away, as well. You would have to be pretty audio-insensitive to be able to sit out on one of the chairs are benches they have out there to enjoy some reading or a drink… and it’s all but impossible to have a chat!